


tastes so sweet (but leaves you feeling sick)

by plinys



Category: Rush (2013)
Genre: F/F, FemTrope Bingo, Femslash February, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-04
Updated: 2014-02-04
Packaged: 2018-01-11 02:57:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1167831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plinys/pseuds/plinys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nobody notices what goes on behind the scenes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	tastes so sweet (but leaves you feeling sick)

**Author's Note:**

> Please ignore my blatant disregard for canon timelines.
> 
> Also being used as the "secret relationship" box on my [femtrope bingo card](http://femtropebingo.tumblr.com/).

Nobody notices the longing looks, the quick glances that flash between them on the track.

Rather than seeing the subtle smiles that the elegant ladies practice behind the scenes, the rest of the world contends themselves with seeing how their faces light up when a camera is turned their way.

 The fake smiles they practice in the mirror at night are easier to swallow with the sugarcoated lies that flow effortlessly from their lips.

They miss the red lipstick smeared on the back of her hands, the scent of lilac that hangs unfamiliarly in the air, and the pair of jeweled sunglasses that look far too _Hollywood_ for her tastes that sit on the bedside table.

Between them keeping their relationship secret becomes almost second nature.

Suzy begins to attend more of the races, something that is hardly noticed by anybody other than Marlene.

And Marlene in turn convinces Niki into attending all those banquets and galas, swindles him into sticking around until the end, that way she can sneak off to the lady’s room to freshen up.

Though there is always somebody waiting there as well.

They used to start these games with small talk, keeping up the appearance of simple friendship and mindless chatter, but the game falls away far too quickly. Instead it builds into something else, a fire that sparks between them.

It was unlike anything she had ever felt before.

Unlike anything she will ever feel again.

She doesn’t find herself to be a romantic, but she hums familiar songs when they come through the radio speakers, because they remind her of times gone past. Spends her money on magazines to look upon the model whose visage which adorns the pages, then claims it’s for the horoscope pages.

Her horoscope reads: _“Your heart is apt to beat much more rapidly than usual. Love is in the air, the trees, and the people around you. Just the smallest seed will blossom into a gorgeous flower right before your eyes. Whatever you do today, make sure that you spend the evening with someone special.”_

So she calls Suzy up for drinks, they’re both in town, a race at the end of the week where else would they be. She ends up smashingly drunk, because it’s easier that way, to make decisions you might regret in the morning, when you whole body seems to pulse with energy and warmth.

Their voices echo around the table finding it easier to say the things they don’t want to talk about than admit what truly plagues their minds.

There’s something in the air, something that’s not quite right, and deep down she knows why.

This weekend will be last race of the season, the last time they will have any proper excuse to see each other.

When Suzy offers for her to stay the night, “my hotel is closer,” a simple excuse that seems to lift off all the weight crushing her down, she accepts without hesitation.

They barely make it into the hotel room before the need overwhelms them, fingers brushing against soft skin, and tiny breathy moans that fill the hair as hands slips lower between them.

Smudged makeup and red lipstick kisses that litter her skin. Dresses falling to the floor in one simple swoop. One heel at the foot of the bed, the other lost somewhere along the way. A little laugh in the shares space between them when it takes only a minute to unclasp her bra, “why can men never figure these out,” Suzy whispers against her skin, and she’s too far gone to come up with a proper reply, just a light laugh, that turns into a never ending kiss.

Eternity could seem to last in that moment.

Then the moment ends and time begins again.

 The same routines done too many times, of pushing away everything so that nobody can tell what really happens between them when no one is watching.

“I’ll see you Saturday,” she says as she slips out of the hotel room.

The click of heels as she walks away echoes through the hallway the space left behind.

She’s not a romantic, never a romantic, but she toys with the idea from time to time. As sits through another dinner the next night, with a man she is probably going to marry, who doesn’t smile at her or compliment her dress, she thinks back on the night before on horoscopes and satin sheets.

And when he looks up at her, she smiles like nothing is wrong.

Saturday comes all too soon.

It is easy enough to slip away during the race as long as they make it back in time for the final lap.

Nobody seems to think anything of it, they’re friends, who watch their boys race around a track all day, while trying not to worry.

Not worrying becomes a lot easier when they’re back in one of the trailers.

The television in the corner serves as background noise, telling them about the race that their missing out on, in order to find their rare moments alone.

Her carefully done up hair falling around her shoulders as it comes undone, nails that scratch at her skull and pull her walls down, just as she pulls Suzy’s blouse half-open, leaving it hanging off of her shoulders.

They break apart with swollen lips time and time again.

There’s not time, never enough time, all too soon they had to get back.

So they turn to the mirrors with careful precision, putting on their makeup again like they’ve practiced so many times before. They stand side by side putting themselves back together so that nobody can tell how seconds before they fell apart against each other.

“We’ll always have next season,” Suzy says as they move to exit the trailer.

“Yes, of course.”

Though that all seems so far away. So much time between this moment and the next one, she wonders how much could change in just a few months.

Then she slips off into the crowd to kiss a man who is none the wiser to what’s going on when he’s not watching.

So when they go to leave for the night, and Niki says to James, “I haven’t seen your wife around,” she has to hold back the light laugh that is bubbling up inside of her.

And while the two men’s eyes sweep the room searching for blond hair and a fur jacket, her own eyes seek out the other woman instantly. A mirror smile on their lips when their eyes meet across the crowd and she simply says, “oh, I have,” in a voice almost too quite too be heard.   


End file.
